LaVar Ball Says Zion “Can’t Hold a Candle” to LiAngelo

Now that the Big Baller Brand website has gone dark amid company shut down rumors, LaVar Ball is looking for anything to get the media’s attention away from his failing business. And the media genius himself has done just that.

In a recent interview with TMZ, LaVar Ball said that his son, LiAngelo, would be taken first overall in this year’s draft if he was available. Yes, before Zion Williamson. Lavar says, “He ain’t no big baller… He’s a Williamson. Williamsons ain’t stronger than Ballers.” He even said that Zion “can’t hold a candle” to LiAngelo. WATCH:

This would definitely be a hot take to anyone else, but for LaVar Ball, this one is on the lazier side. He seems to be following the Big Baller Brand steps to get the media to overreact:
Step 1: Figure out who the best basketball players are
Step 2: Pick one
Step 3: Call TMZ
Step 4: Say you or your son is better than that basketball player.

Come on, LaVar, you’re getting too predictable. Where is the fire? Where are the empty promises and blind guarantees?

Ball also said in the interview that LiAngelo will be in the Summer League this year and guaranteed that he would have an NBA contract. On top of that, he goes on to say that LiAngelo is the biggest and strongest 2 guard in the NBA.

Business insider

There it is. I knew he had it in him. That’s the LaVar we all know and love. So, LiAngelo is not available for the draft, but will make a Summer League roster and be so impressive that he ends up receiving a contract. I understand believing in your kids and having confidence in their abilities, but at what point does it just become a publicity stunt?

Michael Avenatti Accuses Nike of Paying Zion and His Mother

Take this with every grain of salt imaginable due to the fact that Michael Avenatti is currently being accused of extortion, embezzlement and fraud by the very organization he is accusing. Read that story from CNBC here.

In recent weeks, Avenatti has come after several Nike schools trying to expose illegal recruiting methods. He has named Arizona for their recruitment of Deandre Ayton, Oregon for Bol Bol, and UNLV for Brandon McCoy.

He has laid out his “findings” about the 3 players in a recent tweet with a link to a PDF via Dropbox.

We all knew where Avenatti’s never ending crusade to take down Nike was going to end up. I will not get into his opponents in the past, but he loves to go after the biggest names. Now, he is going after the biggest names in college basketball: Coach K and Zion Williamson.

Avenatti even claims that he has some proof of fraudulent payments to Zion’s mother to secure his commitment.

Yikes. Zion is no stranger to these kinds of allegations either. In October, it was discovered that a Kansas assistant coach was caught on an FBI wiretap discussing a price tag for Zion’s commitment.

Look, I want to see Duke go down in flames just as much as everyone else, but if Nike is arranging payments for Duke, Arizona and Oregon, they are doing it for all of the other big programs too. I won’t believe it until I see some hard evidence.

247 Sports

No LeBron, No Zion, What Is ESPN Going to Talk about?

With the exception of “Tebow Time” in 2010, ESPN has always seemed like they are contractually obligated to dedicate any and all airtime not containing highlights to their lord and savior, LeBron James. Now that Zion has broken onto the scene, he is taking up any space that would have normally gone to Bronny Jr. But now, both LeBron and Zion will not be playing basketball until Zion hits the Summer League.

As we all know, Duke got bounced by Mr. March himself, Tom Izzo, and Michigan State. Ending Zion’s college career and Coach K’s streak of continuous Final Four appearances at 0. LeBron is also out. The Lakers will not make the playoffs and reportedly “are forcing” LeBron to take the rest of the season off. I am sure that was incredibly difficult to convince him to do.

So what, oh what, is a network dedicated to sports, like ESPN, going to cover? That’s right, still Zion and LeBron.

When it comes to LeBron, he is going to keep himself relevant. I am sure he is going to write another “Dear slightly younger LeBron” letter warning him that his LA move is going to be difficult and that he should keep his head up. Or, LeBron could show up to random games of the friends that don’t want to play with him and invite himself into their locker room postgame to do a little tampering. Last and most likely, he will be hired as a postseason analyst by ESPN to give his expertise on the playoffs that he isn’t a part of or let Stephen A Smith verbally pleasure him on-air.

Express

Then, there is Zion. He will do a guaranteed 10+ interviews by the time the draft happens on equally terrible ESPN shows. Sportcenter will gladly bump Bryce Harper home runs to make sure that we get more highlights of Zion’s uncontested dunks. They will also leave plenty of time to unironically discuss if Zion will be taken number 1 overall. They may even bring back Skip Bayless to start some controversy because you know he already has his “I wouldn’t take Zion until the second round” takes ready to go.

Sports Illustrated

ESPN could also lop the two together and give us a daily injury report on two people that aren’t injured. They’ll dedicate at least 2 days of airtime to if Zion should sign with Nike after the shoe debacle and let us know how LeBron’s mostly broken hand torn groin is doing. Remember how brave he was for returning after 6 weeks when he should have been out 6 months? Truly an inspiration.

We’re not getting rid of these two that easily.

Getty Images

Best Fat Athletes

We all love a fat athlete. The clinically obese lineman (don’t tell them I said that) always make us feel better about ourselves. We love seeing someone just like us doing something spectacular. Every athlete is skinny now, even the professional eaters.

But there are some fatties still out there doing great things. I am not one to body shame, especially because all of these people can outrun me, but I do love MY people, the out of shape soft 7’s, represented at the biggest stage.
Here are the best (non-lineman) fat athletes in the game:

Zion Williamson
Zion is an absolute UNIT. At 285 pounds, if he were to go to Cleveland, fans would have a tough time distinguishing between him and the Goodyear Blimp. I am not sure about the physics behind it, but no one that heavy should be able to float the way he does.

CJ Anderson
We got to see a new side of CJ Anderson in the NFL Playoffs. In fact, it was hard to miss. He wasn’t always fat though. After he won the Super Bowl with the Broncos, he decided to let loose and bro down. He bounced around a lot after that, and not just team to team. He made this list because, even as a fat guy, he was still taking snaps from Todd Gurley.

Enes Kanter
This man would have LOVED the Clemson championship dinner at the White House. A month ago, Kanter took Treat Yo’Self Day a little too far eating 7 burgers and fries in one sitting. He had to miss practice the next day, because he was “sick”.

CC Sabathia
CC always seems just a little bit out of breath. Whether it be the first inning or the seventh, he always looks like he just got done running a marathon. I hope his stamina was taken into consideration when the MLB decided to lower the pitching mound. That thing can get steep for guys like CC.

Kelvin Benjamin
The leader of the fat athlete movement. I had a hard time choosing between him and Eddie Lacy, but I had to go with Benjamin because he is on a roster. As if the Chiefs needed anymore firepower. He is the the mid-range target for Pat Mahomes. Not out of design, it’s just that he only gets half as far as Tyreek Hill by the time Mahomes throws the ball.

Pablo Sandoval
This dude got a monster contract from the Red Sox in 2015 and completely chonked out. If there was ever a collision at the plate involving Sandoval, I think you could sue the third base coach for personal injuries since he is the one who sent him home.

Pablo Sanchez
Let’s be honest. This dude was the baddest m’fer in all of sports history. Mix Tom Brady with Michael Jordan, Babe Ruth and Cristiano Ronaldo and you get this tiny baller with his belly hanging out. Little man could take anyone yard.

Did we leave anybody out? Let us know on Twitter @soft7sports.

Enes Kanter is Fatter than Future Teammate Zion Williamson

For those that may not know, Zion Williamson (currently a SF/PF enrolled at Duke University) is kinda a hefty boy. However, not willing to be outdone, Enes Kanter tried to prove how much of a fat waste of space he is on the Knicks bench.

Yes, for all you that don’t know, Enes Kanter recently had his coveted “cheat day”, where he posted a video of himself eating 7 burgers and fries in one sitting. While I can respect the effort but the GOAT Joey Chestnut and his 2nd place counter-part Takeru Kobayashi in terms of professional eating/engorging, I can still tip my cap to ol’ Enes trying to show up his future teammate Zion.

However, I cannot tip my cap to the fact that Enes missed practice the next day due to an “illness”.

Hmmm, sounds suspect. I bet Zion wouldn’t have been “sick” and missed practice after his “cheat day”.

Then again, Zion is also a more professional fat person than Enes is.